Near death experience?

What was your nearest near death experience? I was thinking about mine the other day. It was during one of those absurd summer jobs (Dawsons amusements in Bray) which evolved around doing as little as possible while not getting caught. Lots of stupid jobs that summer, one day we had to carry two huge, drugged killer Alsatians from one shed to another, one of the feckers was coming to as we were carrying him, growling and drooling, I still remember him looking at me trying to figure out what was going on, and me thinking “Show no fear”, bloody terrifying. Anyway, two of us were told to push a small portacabin a few yards to one side, so we did, unknown to us there was an cable draped over the roof, and some concrete blocks on the roof, so as we pushed the cable was dragging the block toward the edge and where we were pushing. Suddenly ‘whack’, it falls directly between the two of us. A few inches and it would have been on my head and game over or worse. Sheet, it still gives the the colly wobbles!

wow..
you have had a very exciting life..
I could tell you the story of a mad Arab with a sword in Beirut or a Ukrainian kickboxer with a razor in his glove..but I won't , I'll just pretend **** never happens to me like the time I put my car in the river in Enniskerry..
or the time I was sent to look for unexploded 25 pounder shells in the Glen of Imall with a stick !

Came home one night lots of beers on board, No keys not a sinner in the house. I decided to crawl through the ESB meter housing which is in my porch under the window. So Picture this.Porch with sliding door, so about 2 feet to the meter box and I aint small. Anyway i open the door to the meter and smashed the far side door open into my hall. I stared at the tiny gap and all the mains wires I said "this is not my brightest idea but I'm freezin" So Arse in the air head in 1st then me arms then me shoulders, in I went to get half way through and get stuck.I was very worried the beer had left and I was sober stuck in a high voltage ESB box. Eventually i managed to get through I was white as a ghost as I thought I was a goner, very scary even now thinking of what could of happened. And all the head on bike crashes I've had but I think the ESB one is the nearest to death I've come

Jeebus Daragh, that's priceless! That's what I mean, these things are not always glamorous or exciting, but you sure remember them!

Recently I went to a party and every other guy was wearing the same shirt as me. I nearly died.

What white with pizza all over it or a back to front white t-shirt with pizza on the back?

met this hippy bird in college in Galway pissed
she had this cool idea of going camping after the pub
I was game for anything,pitched the tent.....outta it.
woke up the next morning on a traffic Island in salthill with cars going by.
I nearly Died.

I was once mistaken for a lady from behind..the two boys lechering after me nearly died when I turned around !

I used to work for a computer networking company back in the nineties. We were doing a job in a transport warehouse in Ballymount and one day we had to get cables down to the far end of the warehouse, the only way to do it was use the metal purlins that held the roof on. There was meant to be 3 of use doing the job but 1 guy rang in sick. After setting up the other guy on top of some offices with the boxes of cable I got the big double lenght ladder and started pulling the cable down the warehouse, I was about fifty feet up the the ladder extended all the way, standing on the third last rung of the ladder on my toes with my hands fully extended above my head pulling the cable along. Next thing the bottom of the ladder slid back about two foot on the shiny concrete floor. Luckily it managed to find some grip and stop again or I was definitley a goner. I was never so scared couldn't stop shaking but managed to finish the job...

Mine was the time I got a lift from Richie home from a spin, nearly died with the smell in that feckin Peugeot...

I fell off a bike - mountain bike no less, I was just about to start getting into it. . . (about 3 years ago at this stage) anyway, the pain was only insane, and my guts were in knots, so went to Dr. & then MRI, Then straight to specialist, who upon looking at the MRI on the Tuesday morning says
'The disk went squish & shot out into the ole spinal column, these two nevers are crushed- hence the pain, they control your kidneys, which with this level of compression they are shutting down, I'll operate Friday'
& he did . . . happy ending. . . for those of a mechanical mind, he actually fitted a counter sink into the bones, not unlike a large socket from a socket set & took out all the pulped useless crap including small bones, showed the lot to me after the op - but wouldn't let me keep them, small jam jar full of blood & bone fragments & a half a disky. . . disk-breaks - they sure do. (guffwaaaaaa)

nice one transporter

yeah..I think Skippy was living in that van before he sold it to me..!