Mountain Bike Tyres!

I seem to have contracted the same disease that afflicts Don and I suspect a lot of other MTBers - "Chronic Tyreitis"! I've only been at this for a "wet week" and I have about 12 new and part-worn tyres hanging around my garage ........ and I still can't change one without a major struggle!!
This garage of yours, give me grid co-ordinates, I'm going to tunnel my way in from Newtown.